Thursday, November 19, 2020

Fred

This is probably the hardest blog entry I'll ever write. All too often I've started off an entry with, "I have sad news to report," and now I'm writing from a deeply personal perspective.

Yesterday morning, my best friend and husband of 37 years, died in his favorite chair in our living room. I rushed to his side, but was unable to do anything for him except hold his hand and watch as he took his last breath. The horrible cancer he had fought for the past nearly four years had finally won. 

Many of you knew Fred from his dedication to Joe's Pond Association - mainly in designing and maintaining the web site. After he retired from Social Security Administration, he began learning web design and that became his focus, his avocation. He loved being involved with the Association and doing the website and we often took on those challenges together. We  respected and supported each other, no matter what project was at hand.

It is important to me that his friends at Joe's Pond know how much the friendships he made here meant to him. We both missed the meetings this past summer, but we had high hopes that next year would be better, even as his energy waned and normal activities became so much harder for him. We hoped for some miracle, but we both knew that our time together was limited. It was just unexpected that the end came so soon.

Now, I'm struggling to figure out what my life going forward will be like. I know it will be lonely in a way my friends and family, try as they may, cannot fix. But right now I need time to confront my fears and sadness in order to heal. 

My message tonight is, please give your partner in life an extra hug and tell him/her how fortunate you are to be sharing life together; and love each other like crazy!

6 comments:

Lizzie said...

Jane, my sincere thoughts are with you. Your post is soulful, amazing, and heartfelt. I didn't know Fred well, but seemed like such a sweet man and the two of you were a genuine team! Blessings to you and the family, Liz

Unknown said...

I am so sorry Jane. Through your beautiful words it was always obvious that you and Fred had a loving and timeless friendship. May God bless you, especially now, as you navigate the grief and pain. I will be thinking about you! Lori Thorgalsen Schrader

Anonymous said...

Dear Jane - You don't know me (I'm something of a lurker on the blog), but my heart goes out you. It's so painful to lose someone you clearly loved and seemed so content with. God be with you during this difficult time - Susan

William & Joyce Jones said...

Dear Jane - I am so sorry to hear of Fred's passing. I have such good memories of the time I spent with you & Fred. May the God of all comfort, II Corinthians 1:4, draw near to you with love in this time of grieving. If there is anything we can do for you, just let us know. We're just across the pond.

Sandy&Bill Ricker said...

Dear Jane, Bill and I were very sad to hear of Fred’s passing. Our heart goes out to you...your memories with Fred were beautiful. As we age we all think about that day when one of us is gone. Bill and I sold our Florida home, packed up and moved back to Vermont to be closer to family. We are very happy with our move, although it is quite and adjustment getting use to winter again.
Thank you to you and Fred for all you have done to keep us informed with what’s happening around the pond. We will be back in the summer and Bill walks up your way with our little pup often,
we will stop by and say hi ...Sandy Ricker

Kevin said...


Jane,
Sending you my deepest condolences! Please don't hesitate to ask for anything or any help I can be to you. I always enjoyed working with you on the board over the years and Fred was a tremendous help to me over the years. He offered to build a website for my businesses- Reed Supply and St. J Fire Extinguisher Sales & Service and maintained these sites for many years. This was extreamly helpful and I will forever appreciate his kindness and generosity in helping me out.

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